A Vocation Disabled
SEARCHING FOR COMMUNITY
It was happening again. I bared my soul to reveal my spiritual restlessness, my floundering for a place to belong, a true community. And once again, someone was telling me I should be satisfied with what I had. After all, I was a baptized Catholic, therefore an integral member of the Church, and I had been permitted to take private vows — poverty, chastity, and obedience — approved by the bishop and renewable on a yearly basis. Why could I not be grateful for the graces I had received?
If only it were so simple. If only it were as simple as following a separate set of guidelines for people with disabilities.
Due to an accident at birth, I lost my sight completely. Although my family did their best to give me a sense of well-being, my parents divorced when I was young. As I grew up, I felt alone and abandoned. However, in my misery, I turned to God. I came to understand that life is empty without Him. Without God, everything seems purposeless. While my heart ached for peace in so many ways, I found immense fulfillment in Him.
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Dorothy Day often quoted St. Catherine of Siena, emphasizing one particular saying of hers: “All the way to heaven is heaven because He said ‘I am the Way.’”